Happy Monday! The news from this past weekend (aside from THIS fun feature in the Minneapolis Star Tribune) is that Taylor Swift’s hit “Style” is apparently Darrin’s new jam. Every time T-Swift’s voice comes through our car speakers, Darrin cranks up the volume and starts moving his arms like some strange octopus. There may even be some head bobbing. And I say, more power to ya, hubby! It’s usually best to move when the T-Swift spirit says “move.”
But anyways, here are a few less-than-graceful moments from the past week!
- I’ve decided that the movies and music videos featuring mustangs are all wrong. A horrible case of false advertising. The truth? There is no graceful way to ride in a Mustang. Yes, there’s that initial “wind in your hair” excitement. That undeniable desire to blast the radio beyond a socially acceptable volume and cruise while sporting a pair of sunglasses, even if it’s cloudy with a chance of meatballs. But then you swallow an unusually large bug and can’t cough that bug out of that back of your throat because you’re also swallowing your own hair. And the entire scene is all very entertaining for the middle schooler riding in the old mini-van next to you. Thanks for nothing, Mustang.
- Sometimes, alone in my apartment, I’ll write my essays with a new bag of Boom Chicka Pop Kettle Corn sitting next to me on the couch. And sometimes, I’ll look down in the middle of my research to suddenly find an empty bag of Boom Chicka Pop Kettle Corn sitting next me on the couch. Which is usually followed by an eerie moment of silence. I’m not sure why Paramount Pictures hasn’t turned this horrifying plotline into a major motion picture. Move over, Hitchcock.
- There’s nothing like a 75 year old man destroying a triceratops piñata to inspire you to workout. He broke through that cheap cardboard in one swing. Blindfolded. Let’s not talk about how my swing at the dinosaur went…
- Mouthwash that’s supposed to “strengthen” your teeth shouldn’t make the skin around your lips burn like the fire of a thousand suns, right? I should probably buy a new brand of mouthwash, right? And stop torturing my mouth every night?
- Some couples take romantic walks through the park. Darrin and I take dumb photos in front of the playground’s obnoxious lion-head fountain (see above). Because we’re mature, you know.
Hope you have a great start to your week!