Yesterday we had our first trip to the doctor’s office that didn’t involve any poking or prodding or blood drawing or pants dropping or any other procedural method that needed to be explained to me before it was performed. Our first “normal” checkup. And it was great! Though I’m pretty sure we spent more time waiting for the appointment to begin than we did actually evaluating how my 15 weeks of pregnancy was going. And throw your hands up if you’ve got an anxious heart that despises waiting and is utterly convinced that Hell is really nothing more than an eternity of waiting in a blandly painted room with uncomfortable chairs and boring magazines and somebody constantly blowing their nose in the seat nearby.
God is obviously using this pregnancy to test my patience.
Or my lack thereof.
So we waited. Moved to another room. Did some more waiting. Talked to a nurse for about five minutes. Then waited some more for our midwife. All to the beat of the ticking clock hanging on the wall.
But after waiting for what was probably a much longer duration of time in my mind than it really was in reality, our midwife gave us a visit with her fancy little baby walkie-talkie that amplifies the sound of the baby’s heartbeat. And oh that little heartbeat! Fluttering at just the right speed while my own heart, pulsing with anxiety as I waited to hear any signs of baby, relaxed and melted in my chest. Baby Beekman has been quite the performer during these initial appointments.
And now I want to buy myself one of those baby walkie-talkies (or, let’s be honest, just a massive ultrasound machine) so I can check-in on baby in my spare time. Wake up. Glob some gel on my stomach and go scanning for baby before the day begins. And after lunch. And before dinner. And during dinner. And before I fall asleep.
[Signs you’re already becoming a helicopter parent…]
I guess I’ll just wait some more (my goodness) until our next appointment in MAY (#UGH) before I go dropping some major dollars on ultrasound equipment. More waiting. More patience. More this-is-building-my-character-and-teaching-me-important-life-lessons pep talks.
Next time, I’m definitely hitting “record” on my phone and making that little heartbeat my ringtone.