Less-Than-Graceful Moment: Bowling Alley Bullies

Sometimes Gracefully MondayBowling Alley

Darrin and I had a little Friday night date night over at the local bowling alley this past weekend. The bitter Minnesota weather was frightful, but the cheese curds and the cosmic bowling lights inside were delightful. So delightful, in fact, that the bowling alley was jammed packed with children an unusually large amount of children under the age of 10. While strapping on our Velcro bowling shoes, Darebear and I were praaaaaying that our little lane wasn’t located in the chaotic corner of the alley where some 5 year old was celebrating his birthday. There was a lot of screaming from that side of the room. A lot of crying. A lot of “I want another piece of cake!”. But apparently the bowling alley manager thought we’d fit right in with that kind of crowd, so we pretended like we didn’t see eight runny-nosed children touching every. single. bowling ball and ordered a fresh basket of cheese curds before our first game.

After the birthday party clear out (and the savior employee with the Lysol cleaner wiped down the tables), another family with two 7 year old boys started their own bowling game in the lane right next to me and Darrin. I’ll confess to you right here and now that my bowling talent is less than extraordinary. I’ll step up to the lane grippng my 7 lbs {purple} bowling ball, extend my arm backwards, swing my arm forwards, and release the ball riiiiiiiiiiight into the gutter. Every time. For the entire bowling alley to see. These places are not designed for amateurs. There’s just nothing like broadcasting your horrible bowling score on a massive screen that’s hanging from the ceiling for the all the world to see.

Of course, this whole scenario becomes at least 10 times more stressful and embarrassing when the two 7 year old boys bowling next to you start obnoxiously laughing at every gutter ball you bowl down the lane. And I don’t mean the cute kinds of laughter that tends to come from little boys {i.e. giggling}. No, friends, these two boys were shout-laughing AND POINTING at me after my bowling ball tumbled into the gutter. Grabbing their stomachs. Slapping their knees. Laughing tears of hysteria. And LITERALLY pointing out my lack of talent.

You know you’ve reached a new, less-than-graceful low when…

Luckily the bowling alley bullies only played one game, so I was free to roll my gutter balls without embarrassment during our second game. And we ordered some more bar food, so that helped. 😉

How was your weekend? Have any less-than-graceful moments of your own?


  • Reply jennifer prod December 8, 2014 at 9:00 am

    love this post. my bowling alley experiences have never been pleasant. when/where does one learn to become an expert bowler? i always show up, do my thing, and, surely enough, induce giggles from bystanders. for some reason the bryant bowl lanes seem shorter though? with bumpers? it’s almost okay when i bowl there 🙂

    • Reply Grace Beekman December 8, 2014 at 10:48 pm

      Haha! I wanted to do bumpers! But even the five years olds were going without bumpers…so I thought I’d maybe follow their lead? Never. Again. 😉

  • Reply lachiquitamissi December 8, 2014 at 11:25 am

    I love this post my experiences have never been great at the bowling alley certainly not a pro!

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